Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Six Months as a Family of Six

How can I even tell how much the Lord has blessed us.  We've had our Panda home for six months.

Earlier today, the big kids were outside.  The Panda and I had a rare, quiet moment alone.  I was feeding him a bottle and singing one of our special songs.  I got a little teary.  That "relief" that I didn't even know was an emotion before is still overwhelming sometimes.  He blinked really hard.  Squeezed those little eyes shut.  Clearly, he wanted me to imitate.  I did, and squeezed out a tear.  The Panda laughed and squeezed again.  He really thought that my dripping blinks were cool.  Sheesh.

*six months ago he could barely sit up for half a minute
Now he can walk 5-6 feet

*six months ago he was tiny
Now he's a hulking giant and I can barely carry him

*six months ago he'd never seen a book
Now he can't get enough

*six months ago he didn't ask for anything
Now he seeks out "his people" to meet his needs

*six months ago he had no roof to his mouth
Now he has one!  (Thanks Dr. Boyajian!)

*six months ago he was whiter than I am
Now he's a beautiful brown

*six months ago he didn't play or explore
Now he's trying his best to climb furniture and knows just what to do with toys

*six months ago he couldn't hear
Now he is starting to understand (thanks Dr. Zalzal!)

*six months ago, we had the sad peekaboo game and serious overstimulation problems
Now Peekaboo is fun and overstimulation is pretty rare (but we keep the world small...)

*six months ago, he wouldn't eat solids
Well, that hasn't changed, yet...  :)

So, how about me?

*six months ago I felt so sad, so aching, so desperate
Now I'm relieved, my baby is safe.
I'll note that I now feel sad and aching because I miss my husband, but not desperate- I know he's ok.  :)

*six months ago I was really jealous that my husband had a daughter to hold each hand
Now I rejoice because I have a son to hold each of mine

*six months ago I wondered just *how* effective prayer is
Now I know.  The Lord has done a great work.

Our school year is wrapping up.  We've been using Mystery of History I (Ancient History).  Really super text.  We just got to the end of the Old Testament in it, so I started reading the Gospel of Matthew, written 400 years after the end of the OT.  We got to Chapter 4, Verse 1...

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.

The Penguin wanted to know why?  Why did He have to go through this?  Great question.

Hebrews 4:14:

Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess.  For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.  Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

Being a mom has required me to run (or drag my injured self) to the throne of grace pretty frequently.  I keep getting tempted and falling into sin.  How great is it that Jesus personally experienced every temptation that I ever will, and DIDN'T SIN!  He defeated every temptation.  He is glad to give grace to me in my failure, and new mercy to have victory over sin.

Oh, Lord, make me glad to give grace and mercy to my children instead of condemnation.

No comments:

Post a Comment