So, How's it Going? Twelve Days of Thomas (at home, that is...)

Everything is going so well.  The Panda is such a happy baby- lots of smiles and laughter and not very much crying. He loves all "baby games" like peek-a-boo and patty cake.  He likes singing and toys.  He loves the fun sisters.  He drinks 60 oz. of formula a day, and sleeps like, well, a baby....  He can crawl much better than  he could two weeks ago.  I have not spotted anything that concerns me about his attachment process.

He's scared of being undressed, bathing, and food.  We are making progress- he will touch food now, sometimes.  He is more comfortable sitting at the table watching other people eat.  If you get it near his mouth, he turns away and covers his eyes and mouth.  Even a lollypop gets this reaction.  Even juice or cereal in a bottle gets the horrified reaction.  He is not scared of some typical things, like pets and vacuum cleaners though.

He had his first cleft team visit yesterday, which was a 13 hour saga (travel time included).  If the Bunny hadn't played with him when we got home, mom and dad would have been unconscious with a baby on the loose.  Dr. Boyajian at Children's National Medical Center in DC seemed great, and is willing to do his lip and palate surgery at one time, so we are scheduled for Jan 11.  He has fluid in his ears, and some hearing loss, but the ENT thinks tubes will probably fix the problem.  The Panda handled his 8 hours of appointments so calmly, even though he was awake for 10 straight hours, but he was a little screamy during the car ride home- even crying in his sleep.

The Panda LOVES Granddad.  Anyone who knows us is not surprised here.  They play their silly baby games and already have their little secrets.

We have so much to be thankful for on this day before Thanksgiving.  Here's a great promise from the Lord, who is faithful, to help spur us on to more and more thanksgiving.

Psalm 50:23
The one who offers thanksgiving as his sacrifice glorifies me; to one who orders his way rightly I will show the salvation of God!”

Be a tiny part of something big- a God thing!

http://mattmandi.blogspot.com/2011/11/whew.html

Please consider helping a family add a beautiful daughter.  They are fundraising for adoption expenses, and every little bit helps.

China Pictures

I'm no expert at pictures, but if you go to photobucket.com and search for the user matthiaszoo, you can see all our China pictures.  :)

We are so jet lagged.  Matt and I are waking up at 11 pm.  Not great.  Good thing our kids are being really nice about it.  The Panda is waking up at about 2-3 am.  Blah.

Home by the Grace of God

Ok, Matt and the Panda are sleeping.  I moved all our posts from Babyjellybeans.com over here.  Maybe someday I'll edit them.  I took the Puppy to soccer this morning.  Life is "normal" again.

The Panda was such a good traveler.  About an hour into the long flight (11 hr 30 min) from Hong Kong to San Francisco, he nodded off.  I poked the Penguin, who was on the other side of him, and as she pulled out her earbud, I said "Don't wake him up!" in a whisper.  She got a crazed look, grabbed his head and shook vigorously.  I did the whole "what the heck are you doing" thing- apparently she missed the "don't" during the earbud removal, and thought I'd said "wake him up!".  So the Panda was awake for 8 hours during that flight, but was very good and quiet.  Then he cried for about an hour because he only likes to sleep in a bed or crib.  We got him to sleep for about 2 hours, and then landed.

I am a little scared of flying.  I do a lot of praying.  How much we have to be thankful to God for.  He was so merciful to us on this trip.  The Penguin was only sick for a couple hours and the rest of us were fine - congestion and sore throats were the worst of it, and not bad at all.  The Panda adjusted so well.  We had a wonderful travel group and super guides.  All the paperwork went smoothly.  Eight kids who had no families, no hope, no future, now have all of that, and six families who longed for them now have sons and daughters.

The Panda became a US Citizen at immigration in San Francisco.  Another huge moment of thankfulness.

The girls slept through the three hour layover in San Francisco and through 5 hours of the 5.5 hour flight home.  The Panda fell asleep before the plane took off, and slept until it was almost time to land.  No crying.  Matt and I dozed, but neither of us sleep on planes very well.

Our wonderful friends the Perrins met us at the airport with a big sign and balloon for Thomas.  They took great pictures of our homecoming.  They brought us home.  The Panda did not hate the car seat, and slept for some of the car ride.  We got home at midnight after 30 hours of being awake.  I fed the Panda, changed his diaper, put him in the crib which apparently neighbors and friends and my dad moved heaven and earth to get into our room, and took a shower and went to sleep.  I got 7 straight hours, another mercy straight from heaven.  Matt is having a little more trouble with the sleep thing...  The entire Tiananmen Square lego set is built....  I hope his current nap helps.

The Panda woke up this morning and met my dad and the Puppy, and has been smiley and it just seems like he's been here forever.  I feel tired, but ok, and so very very thankful to God and our friends and family and church.  Maybe I'll figure out how to upload pictures soon...  


1 Peter 2:10
Once you were not a people, but now you are God's people; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.


Daniel 9:18
O my God, incline your ear and hear. Open your eyes and see our desolations, and the city that is called by your name. For we do not present our pleas before you because of our righteousness, but because of your great mercy.

Yesterday was not a very blogworthy day.  We'd hoped to go to the Safari Park, which is outside of Guangzhou, but it rained all day.  It is still raining today.
This morning we had our consulate appointment, where we (and other families) took the oath of citizenship for our kids.  All of the families with America World (our agency) had paperwork that said that we did not want Social Security numbers for our kids.  We all decided to change that and get them- don't know why the paperwork was messed up.  Then the officer said that we'd all have to re-change the kids names in the US, which I hadn't heard before.  Also, we have to carry Thomas's chest x-rays so we have them when we enter the US.  Please pray that we don't have any major issues.
We came back to the hotel for Thomas's nap, and this afternoon we are planning to explore Shaiman Island.  We've only had a total of about 3 hours down there of just free time to explore.
Tomorrow, we will have breakfast, pack up, check out and take a bus to Hong Kong with three other families.  We all have Friday flights out of Hong Kong.  Two more sleeps and then we'll be in our own beds.  I can't wait to see Matthew.  China has really been great, though. 

This morning after breakfast, we went to have the TB tests of the kids who are over 2 years old read.  Of course, Thomas tested positive, and had to have chest x-rays.  I'm not sure if they showed nothing or dormant TB, since everyone was shouting in Chinese at me, but apparently we've got the all clear to immigrate.  My wonderful US doc. can sort out the rest.  Whew.  God answered my panicked prayer at the clinic. Then we shopped.  We bought everything.  Then we went to the wholesale toy market and bought everything else.  Very fun.  And we finally found a cool present for my Snuggle Puppy. It took 50 minutes for me to hail a cab to get back to the  hotel.  The kids were all so good during the wait.  So here's the way to get a Chinese cab.  Where ever there is a white fence thing by the road, walk down the actual street to where a car is already stopped.  Then flap your arm up and down at every cab that passes by until one stops.  Lots of fun, with traffic rushing by. We are about to try another bath- Thomas really doesn't enjoy the water yet.

Today, we toured the Chen Clan Academy in Guangzhou.  It was a beautiful garden with rooms full of art and ornate old furniture and metal statues.  Thomas was wearing the outfit that we received him in, and it has traditional Chinese split pants.  All the grandmas at the garden seemed to approve, and they all wanted to talk to us.  They finally dragged in a student to translate.  They wanted to know where we were from and how many children we have, and when we would fix Thomas's lip. We did lots of shopping.  There was an artist at the temple garden that made beautiful things, and then we went to the pearl market and jade market.  We went to a Cantonese restaurant with our guides, which was mostly pretty good.  On the short walk home, we wandered through the mall and got the kids all Chinese outfits. Then we came back to the room and had naptime for Thomas, and I did laundry in the tub, which is a very good workout.  Whew. Papa John's for dinner, ordered right to the hotel- tastes just like American Papa Johns... Tonight is our one week anniversary with Thomas.  He's traveled a really long journey in one little week, and is handling all the change so well.  Our only big concerns are that he still won't bear any weight on his legs, and won't eat any solids at all, but we'll work through those things.  The big stuff, like playing and enjoying having a family, is going very well.

While Matt and Elizabeth were at breakfast this morning, I Skyped with Matthew and my dad.  I miss them so much!  After a kind of rushed breakfast, we went with the group for the kids medical exams. No big deal, but of course Thomas didn't like his PPD test.  Please pray that it is negative!

It made me so happy to see so many little ones with new families.  My heart is so broken for what so many children suffer because they don't have a family.  Thomas is doing so well, but when he smacks his head repeatedly,  or can't fall asleep in his mother's arms, it is just a reminder that all isn't right with the world.

We walked around Shaiman Island briefly, and went into Jordan's for a minute, and ate at Lucy's (just a snack).  Good fries, good spring rolls.  I can't wait to go back to do some real shopping!

On the way back to the hotel, we stopped at a Carrefore (grocery) to get diapers and formula and snacks.  We are trying the steak and chicken chips, and green tea Pocky.  Very fun.  We need to test out which are the best snacks to take home to Matthew.  We also picked up a stroller- our backs are killing us.  We found out at the medical exam that Thomas weighs 23.5 pounds.  

We have a little paperwork tonight, and then rest.  The girls have been so good on the trip, but they are starting to get on each other's nerves (and on ours a little...).  Please pray that God would give us all patience.  :)

Nov. 4 Last night, we found out that Thomas has been holding out on us… he was playing with this little card, and threw it, and next thing I knew, he crawled a little to get it.  Not great crawling but it’s a start. Today was a travel day, from Lanzhou to Guangzhou.  We got up and said goodbye to travel mates who were headed to a second province to adopt a second child, and had breakfast and headed to the airport.  Our flight was fine- we found another American couple, whom we’d met briefly on adoption day.  There were many babies on the flight and a few hearty rounds of screaming, but we survived.  Flying is hard, because even though Thomas lets us hold him for bottles, he still has never fallen asleep in our arms, but he’s too big to lay down on a plane without touching someone. Our wonderful guide from Beijing, Lilly, picked us up at the airport.  It was great to see her.  We had a big bus and lots of space on the way to the China Hotel (Marriott).  Our rooms are very nice here, although they gave us a not so great playpen for Thomas.  He slept straight through the night, though.  At the airport, we had a long, fast walk from the terminal to the bus, and carrying Thomas so far and fast was nearly beyond my ability.  My blood sugar dropped and I was feeling pretty grouchy last night.  We ate at our first Chinese McDonalds, since it was right next to the hotel, and I was done.  It tastes just like US McDonalds.  We all had fountain drinks with ice and Ginny had lettuce on her sandwich and I was too out of it to pay attention, but so far we are not sick.  I have a bit of a sore throat this morning and feel achy, but not terrible. I’m writing this the morning of Nov. 5, since I totally crashed when we got back to the room.  Matt went to make copies of Thomas’s Chinese passport, and I gave Thomas a quick bath, which made him unhappy.  Then he had a bottle and we both fell asleep. Today is his medical exam and TB test- pray that all goes well.  Thanks!

Elizabeth woke in the middle of the night vomiting, but after sleeping some more she has been fine today.  I just know it is because she ate the raw parsley garnish on the beef noodles at the restaurant yesterday... We went on a tour of the museum here in Lanzhou today- there are dinosaurs and beautiful silk and pottery dating back 2000 years.  The most famous exhibit is the Galloping Bronze Horse that was found in Wuwei.  Lanzhou is along the Silk Road, and the history here is fascinating.  We were able to buy a book at the museum shop about Gansu, and a silk map of the province.  Our wonderful guide, Steed, also handed out paper maps of Gansu in English. Next, we went to the famous Yellow River waterwheels, which are huge and beautiful.  There was a little shop there with art, so we were able to get some great souviniers, including a replica of the Galloping Bronze Horse, some art that is common to Qingyang, Thomas's birthplace, and a painting of pandas on silk. We made a quick stop at a famous sculpture that was made by a lady artist in the 1980's along the Yellow River of a mother and baby for family pictures.  Then we ate at Pizza Mira, which was ok.  The fries were amazing. I made the daily water run to the store, and poked around while Thomas napped with Matt and the girls.  I was looking at these crazy green boots for Elizabeth, who LOVES green, and the sales lady dragged me off with them and sold them to me for an ENORMOUS discount.  Less than $7 US dollars...  so if you see my kid in crazy boots, that's why. Tomorrow we fly to Guangzhou in the south of China to  complete the US portion of the adoption paperwork.  Everyone says Guangzhou is so much better than here, but I've enjoyed it here very much.  Seeing Thomas come out of his shell has been great.  He's still doing self-stimulating behaviours like smacking his head, staring at his hands, and rhythmic rocking, but he's having good eye contact and more laughing and smiling too.  He even lets me touch kind of near his mouth, all over his face now.  He still HATES having his mouth or cleft area touched.

Mother with child sculpture (represents China and her people) November 03, 2011 order prints Lanzhou Waterwheels November 03, 2011 order prints Galloping Bronze Horse of Wuwei November 03, 2011 order prints Steed pointing out Qingyang November 03, 2011 order prints Happy baby November 03, 2011 order prints

Thomas woke up a happy boy this morning.  We haven't had very much crying at all.  He has started to cough a little, but doesn't seem too big a deal yet.  Maybe the initial deep grief is fading a little.  He is eating formula very well now, but really not happy about any baby food or solids even approaching his mouth.  I think our guide was so smart to give us so much downtime the first few days.  Going out with Thomas today was fun, but even just yesterday, it would have been hard.  He seems stronger today, but still very weak considering he's 27 mos. We went to the Lanzhou park and zoo today.  They have so many very beautiful animals, but the cages aren't great.  The panda came out to see us.  Many Chinese tourists were more interested in us than the panda.  More people than I expected approach our cleft-affected kids in a friendly way, but there are a few who stare at the kids.  All the babies really seemed to enjoy the outing- no real screaming at all at the zoo.  Our guide, Steed, is great- he brought extra strollers, which were a life saver, and he tells jokes in English that are actually funny. The older folks at the park were doing tai-chi, water painting, and playing instruments.  It looked like a wonderful place to hang out.  The view of the surrounding mountains is breathtaking.  The road was very bumpy, but we have a great bus driver.  I haven't felt uncomfortable without a seat belt at all. Then we had a quick stop at the police station for a passport picture for the babies, and we went to the famous Lanzhou beef noodle restaurant.  It was good, but the pulled noodles that they serve for breakfast at the Landison Hotel where we are staying are better, imho.  Maybe just because they leave out the cilantro for me....  Watching the chef pull the noodles by hand is pretty amazing- I've never seen anything like it.  He just grabs some dough and starts stretching, and suddenly, he's holding noodles. We came back to the room and got ready for naptime, and one of the other moms and I headed out for our daily "buy more water from the store" trip.  On the way, we stopped at a boutique and bought really cute baby shoes.  Of course, Thomas's have pandas... The girls enjoyed some Chinese cartoons on TV while I was gone.  You don't have to speak the language to follow the plot of a cartoon. We expected it to be freezing in Lanzhou and came equipped with parkas and everything, but it is very warm- at least in the 60's, and not below 50, even at night.  The Chinese still expect you to bundle the babies in many layers, and I got yelled out when a bit of his leg peeked between his pants and socks.  He was already sweating from all his clothes, though... Thomas just woke up (almost 4 pm here) and had his 4th bottle today.  He'll have at least one more before bed, so that's the most he's eaten for us in a day, by far.  Yay!  He lets me hold him for every bottle, and looks at me as much as he can stand.  I think we are growing on him.  :)

Lanzhou famous Beef Noodle Restaurant November 03, 2011 order prints Panda November 03, 2011 order prints later today November 02, 2011 Thomas really played for the first time after his nap.  He played with a toy car, and used his hands to pick up and hold things better than ever.  He sat up alone for a really long time, and can reach and scoot when you put his toy car out of his reach.  He even crawled 2-3 little steps to get it once.  He's all worn out and just playing while laying down now, but not ready for sleep.  Still no really long crying fit yet today. Matt is totally crashed out, and I'm so tired.  The time change/ jet lag is still hard.  Good thing Ginny is here...  her (usually annoying) ability to avoid sleep is very useful, and Thomas loves her.  And good thing Thomas is a good napper and sleeper.

Well, at about 7 last night, we tried to give Thomas a bottle, and he REFUSED.  He cried and grieved and played the sad peekaboo.  He is (thank heavens) a great sleeper, and only woke once.  When I tried to give the bottle, he REFUSED again and slept until morning.  He still REFUSED to eat, and played and cried sadly.  I went to breakfast with Elizabeth and then Matt went with Ginny. While they were gone, Thomas and I had a little showdown.  It had been 14 hours since he had any liquid or formula.  I finally pinned his little arms and stuck the bottle in.  After a few seconds he started swallowing, and after a few more he started the chewing thing that he does (babies with cleft palates can't suck).  He downed almost the whole bottle.  This is a big deal because it was the first time he'd let me hold him and the bottle during feeding, instead of laying flat and holding the bottle himself.  Also, he gazed into my eyes.  Good signs. We got ready for a family grocery store trip, but Thomas went back to sleep.  Matt and Ginny went without us, and when Thomas woke up we had a few more milestones.  It wasn't time for formula yet, but I poured some of E's green Hawaiian Punch into a DIFFERENT bottle, and after dribbling a little into Thomas's mouth, he grabbed the bottle and drank it.  So, first time for a new flavor, and for a cleft bottle.  And he let me hold him. Then we played with his stacking cups a little, and he knocked them down a few times.  He held a cup in each hand and managed to pass a cup from one hand to the other. His grief is so deep, though.  He seems weaker than he did when we got him.  He is sleeping so much today.  There is a lot of crying between moments of fun.  His little arms and legs are so weak, and his core muscles are very weak.  I guess grief, extra activity, and crying really wear a baby out.  Just sitting up is hard work for him right now.  When we hold him, he doesn't hold back, or curl his legs around us- just limp.   No sign of crawling, no bearing weight on his legs.  No interest in solid food.   At least he seems to be back to eating a little formula.... and he sleeps so far.... And it took 2 hours to write this blog.... aaahh, babyhood.

more little details October 31, 2011 order prints He's letting Baba (Matt) hold him for a bottle now. Gansu is a very beautiful place.  The mountains are HUGE like the Alps.  Bigger than any I've seen in the US.  The view from the airplane was fabulous. Lanzhou is a huge city, but between the airport and the city, there are mountian caves that are obviously homes.  The Yellow River runs right through this city. We are trying strange Chinese candy from the shopping trip- very fun!

Oct. 31, 2011    2:11 pm China time We woke up this morning at about 5 am.  Thomas didn't wake up until a little later.  We were able to Skype with Matthew and my dad, and they are doing well.  Thomas woke up at the end of the call and the brothers got to "meet".   Thomas had his first bath, and did not enjoy it...  We take so long to get ready, now...  managed to get to breakfast at 7:30 and were a little late getting to the bus to go to civil affairs office to complete the adoption.  All the paperwork for the Chinese part of the adoption is done.  We got to meet Thomas's orphanage director and one nanny, and they were both great!  We signed our names and made our red thumb prints and Thomas made his red footprint, and he is our son forever. We are able to get him to drink from the one bottle from the orphanage, but not other bottles.  So far, he will not taste any solids or anything like yogurt or congee or cheerios.  We are really hoping he will take to "snacking" soon. Matt brought the kids back to the room at about 12:30 when everything was done, and I toured the grocery store.  We will go back when Thomas wakes up from his nap to actually buy things.  His nanny said that they call him "Zhou Zhou" which is pronounced "Joe Joe".  We have been getting some smiles and giggles this afternoon, but he still has moments of sadness.  I think he is easily overstimulated, so we will see how the grocery store goes...

Adoption complete October 31, 2011 order prints With the red footprint from Thomas and multiple red fingerprints from us, the adoption is now complete in China. Qingyang Nanny October 31, 2011 order prints The Nanny was very helpful and really cares for each child.  She asked that we send a picture of Thomas once his cleft is repaired so they all can see how he is improving. Qingyang Director October 31, 2011 order prints This is the director from the Qingyang SWI.  He seemed to really know each of the children and gave us as many tips on what Thomas likes as the Nanny did.  It is really nice to know that the SWI took such personalized attention for each child.

All is well here.  We had a delayed flight from Beijing to Lanzhou because of extreme fog.  We arrived in Lanzhou and drove straight to a small passport photo place where our babies were waiting, and all four families received their kids right then.  Thomas Fu Zhou did not cry at first.  He played and got pictures and went to all of us.  As soon as all the other babies stopped crying, Thomas started.  He cried for the van ride to the hotel, checking into the hotel, and getting a room.  He cried when I gave him a bottle, and refused it and pushed it away.  He refused cheerios and every toy.  So I just snuggled him.  He played the saddest game of peekaboo ever.  He covered his eyes so he couldn't see me, and then uncovered them.  You could tell that he kept hoping that when he uncovered them, I would have turned back into his nanny.  Finally, I had the girls turn off the lights and gather round and we all pretended to sleep while I was holding him, and he drifted off.  Matt returned from the paperwork with a box of treasures from the SWI, which included his favorite bottle and formula.  When he woke up at 2:30 am, I gave him that bottle, and he sucked it straight down without a single drip and played and smiled and then went back to sleep.  We shall see how he feels when he wakes up and still has new mama and baba.

Fog Delays in Beijing October 30, 2011 order prints Our view as we waited until about 4-5 hours after our takeoff time before we even boarded the plane. Coming to Gansu October 30, 2011 order prints Mountains in Gansu Gotcha Matthias Family October 30, 2011 order prints The newest member of the Matthias family with Daddy (baba), Mommy (mama), Ginny (jie jie) and Elizabeth (little jie jie).